Contents
Sub-personalities A Personal Perspective
Introduction
The following is based on a talk I gave as part of my 1st Years Psychosynthesis course on 30th October 2002. When I was told we had to pick a topic to talk on this is the first one that sprung to mind, so I decided it would probably be a good one for me to choose to talk on although I acknowledge that all topics we have covered this year are important and could have been equally beneficial for me to write a talk on.
Over the time I've spent thinking about what things I would write about sub-personalities I became aware of some things that make this particular topic highly relevant for me. It has to do with the relationship between public speaking giving speeches and some of my own sub-personalities. I will therefore give a little of the background here, before I talk about what sub-personalities actually are, as I currently understand them.
When I was at high school and we had to give a speech to the class as part of the English curriculum, I would take time off school, "sick", and completely avoid giving the speech. On the occasions where the teacher would still make me give a speech I would look down at my notes, read rapidly in monotone, and basically block out awareness of the other people in the class.
Later in life, mid twenties to now, I have had occasion to speak publicly again. I found it a lot easier, and I did not feel the need to avoid the situations most likely because I chose to be involved in them rather than "forced" into them. In one situation I even talked for about 10 minutes without any prepared notes although I did not find this easy at all. While talking though, I noticed something about changes within myself. I was easily able to talk, in a nice loud voice (and be told afterwards that I had a good voice for public speaking), but internally, while talking, I was still not very present. I still lost awareness of the people listening, and what I found worst was that I was very aware that I was just talking, generally reading from a prepared script, and that I was virtually unable to think during this time so it was a very "mechanical" process of just talking, rather than being relaxed and present.
All of you most likely recognise from what I have just said, there are the two polar opposites, which I now recognise as being sub-personalities, which are coming into play when I talk in front of people. The one which chooses to run and avoid the situation, the other which is able to talk, but still shuts off from the external world and means I do not stay present within the Self while talking.
I therefore see that tonight gives me my first real opportunity to see how well I go with talking and staying present.
* * *
I will first talk about how sub-personalities form and their function within the personality, before discussing how in Psychosynthesis we work to re-integrate them back into the Self.
How sub-personalities form
Rather than our personality being one complete and inseparable "entity", it is in fact comprised of a multitude of smaller parts, which we refer to as sub-personalities. Each of these smaller parts of the overall personality has a life of it's own, and it's own agenda.
In childhood we develop various beliefs about life as we experience it, and from this we develop coping strategies and mechanisms for getting our needs met. These strategies revolve around manipulating others, in order to meet our needs, which is necessary and appropriate for a baby or young child, as we don't yet have the means to meet our own needs. It is from these beliefs and coping mechanisms that sub-personalities form.
A sub-personality has a life of its own and a very rigid belief structure about how it can get what it needs based on the experiences of the past. Over time this belief structure becomes even more fixed and rigid. As they form very early in our development they are all very childlike in their outlook, only concerned with meeting their needs, through manipulation. They each have their own agenda, and ultimately they view what they are doing as being in the best interest of the Self. However, being based purely on past experience, and also formed at a stage where a person is actually dependant on others to meet their needs they tend to be very limiting, and not open to the change that leads to immense personal growth.
A sub-personality is not strong enough to subvert the entire personality, although in extreme cases if there is trauma involved this can lead to psychosis and "split personality" also known as "multiple personality disorder syndrome". Probably the most well known case of this multiple personality disorder is the woman known as "Sybil", some of you may have seen the movie or read the book about this case.
A Sub-personality works via an agenda of trying to convince the Self that the sub-personality's beliefs are correct, and getting the Self to carry out its behaviours (via an Act of Will).
Sub-personalities always come in pairs. There is always a polar opposite to a sub-personality, although it may be so weak that it is not noticed, and even when work is first done on sub-personalities it may be difficult to find. However, knowing that there is a polar opposite makes it easy to understand what the traits of the weaker sub-personality are likely to be.
It is due to this imbalance between the polar opposite sub-personalities that issues arise. The dominant one will take over at times when it believes it is needed (i.e. for survival), or at times it is in a situation where is recognises it can meet it's needs. This can cause a conflict within the personality, where the weaker, polar opposite sub-personality also begins to try and achieve it's diametrically opposed agenda. A pendulum type effect results, with each sub-personality vying for attention. It can easily be pictured in a classic type view of a devil on one shoulder, and an angel on the other, each whispering into an ear, telling the Self what needs to be done. Confusion results. This is the stage that sub-personalities are dysfunctional, being unbalanced. Often this can lead to an inability to actually achieve anything, where the mind is clouded with the opposing views of each of the sub-personalities, and we can end up "stuck" not knowing which actions are appropriate for us. This is, however, due mainly to the thinking process, where we can see both sides of the argument, both have some merit, but ultimately neither stands out as the thing that must be done for our happiness, welfare and survival. It is the reason why a creative solution must be found, and "And", which allows us to meet the needs of both sub-personalities to some degree, and start off a transformation process to integrate and synthesis the sub-personalities.
Stages of synthesising sub-personalities
There are five stages in the process of synthesising sub-personalities.
The first stage of the process is recognition. First we must recognise that we have sub-personalities, and then recognise each sub-personality we are to deal with. Without recognition, no work with sub-personalities (or other areas of our Self growth) is possible.
Next is acceptance. We must accept the sub-personality for what it is, and understand what it's needs are, and how it was formed. Often we may be afraid or want to reject sub-personalities that have behaviours, which we find repulsive (either to the Self, or to other sub-personalities).
Co-operation is the third stage. We need to gain the co-operation of the sub-personalities involved, no just the dominant one, but also the suppressed one. The dominant one has to co-operate to allow the qualities of the suppressed sub-personality to come through, and for this one to gain some strength and power.
Integration is the fourth stage. It is here that the two polar opposite sub-personalities begin to change and integrate into their "And", into a new sub-personality which embodies qualities of both the sub-personalities, and can better meet the needs of the Self.
These stages may happen "out of order", that is we may get some co-operation and then a little integration before we find more acceptance of the sub-personalities and this may spark of more recognition, perhaps about the true beliefs or needs of the sub-personalities, or even recognition of other sub-personalities that where closely tied to the initial sub-personalities, in a conglomerate.
The final stage of the process is the synthesis of the sub-personalities back into the Self. Once this has happened the sub-personalities cease to be in the form that they once were, but are now a healthy part of the growing Self.
This is a long process that will happen over time, and changes in our own behaviours will occur, and also be mirrored in our external world.
Personal Experiences
While I started working with sub-personalities last year, during my sessions with a Psychosynthesis 'therapist', it has been this year, in the past couple of months, that I believe my greatest breakthroughs have happened so far.
In a guided session I became aware that one of the main sub-personalities influencing my behaviour was a rebel sub-personality. Originally I had thought it was just a sub I likened to "Indiana Jones", an adventurer. However, in the session it became obvious that The Rebel was doing things for rebellions sake only, and it didn't always have my best interests at heart (although it may have believed so). I was also concerned as I was aware that some of the behaviours didn't really have respect for boundaries, especially other people's boundaries. The Rebel is more concerned with just rebelling, and also seeing how far things can go, really pushing the limits, but without really taking in to account my best interests, or the best interests of other people who may be involved. An example of this was that if I found myself in a situation, even if I didn't particularly want to be there, I found myself staying, just to "see what would happen". So staying with this sub I was not honouring my feelings.
I felt really positive after this session, and think I made the mistake of thinking now that I had a good awareness of this sub, and it's polar opposite, The Moralist, that a lot of situations in my life would change. I still believe that a big change has come over me since I started the integration of these two sub-personalities. The "And" for them seems very positive, and I currently refer to it as "freedom", although originally considered that it was The Adventurer sub, as being adventurous was one of it's main qualities. It is also self-checking towards what is "right" / "wrong" and acts more towards what is appropriate for me in a situation, while still being able to push boundaries which brings about growth.
I currently believe the "trap" for me was not being aware of the extent to which this sub worked in a conglomerate with other sub-personalities.
My last guided session turned up a lot of stuff for me, which has made me reflect on many aspects of my life. What came up for me was that I have a sub-personality that believes it can only meet its needs via covert behaviours, being sneaky. This made sense in the context of the session. Over the past week I have become aware as to just what extent this has been the case in my life, meeting needs covertly, and being sneaky. To a degree I would say it has left me a little stunned. I have been very aware when I'm in situation where my needs are being met covertly, not completely openly and honest.
Not having realised that there were both The Rebel and also the Covert sub-personalities working in a conglomerate I believe I slipped into a trap, but now the recognition of this has allowed me to see why my behaviours were still the same, and I felt that something still wasn't quite right.
With this "Covert" sub-personality I am really just at the stages of recognition and acceptance. I am constantly recognising when this sub is coming into play, but I have not yet started work on looking at its polar opposite and gaining their co-operation before starting integration. This is my next short-term goal as far as sub-personality work goes, as it is having a major effect on my life and relationships, and the type of people I am attracting into my life.
I am finding it somewhat difficult to really "accept" how destructive and limiting this sub-personality is for me. I am still involved in a relationship which is "covert" and relies on secrecy, and that is another situation I need to find a creative "And" for ultimately I recognise it will bring an end to the relationship, but I need to change things within myself so I don't feel that I am just cutting off from the relationship and running away from it, as I have tended to do in the past. I don't believe that that is actually dealing with the situation, as I find I am still attracting the same types of people and situations into my life.
* * *
For more information on Psychosynthesis you can check out the following websites:
- Inner Path
- The Will Project
- Southern Psychosynthesis Community Network
- Psychosynthesis - Two Not 2
- Psychosynthesis Books
- Psychosynthesis Online
Back to Esoteric Articles - Magical Path
contact: email Magical
Path -